This was our first and last trip to Berlin. which I have to say is perhaps the most soul-destroying lack lustre, grim, gloomy dreary, dismal, sombre depressing city with more environmental colour likely to found on the dark side of the moon by a man with a white cane walking a guide dog I have ever had the misfortune to visit. However, if grey skies, grey walls, grey windows, grey floors, grey roads, grey cars are your thing, including an overwhelming abundance of grey 1960’s concrete Lego-block buildings covered in graffiti are your thing; then I apologise; for the aforementioned statement… you’ll love Berlin.
We stayed at the Lux 11. During the check in process; we were advised despite the fact we had paid for breakfast this was not the case. So, we presented a receipt illustrating payment to the Lux 11 stating that we had in fact pre-paid for breakfast; the very camp ‘matter of fact’ manager seemed completely disinterested, rolled his eyes and said, ‘But no, you haven’t paid’ So off to a great start! Eventually; the clown made a phone call and agreed that we were in fact correct and gave us our key.
We had paid a lot for a self-contained luxury apartment; which sadly, but not unexpectedly failed to live up to expectations of the web-site. To say the room was small was an understatement; the toilet was so minute you felt like you on a Ryanair flight, the shower area was completely open so there was no privacy and the cooking area was filthy as was the fridge. Having gone back downstairs to complain; we were upgraded to a superior room. By now we were exhausted and despite the new kitchen area still being dirty we simply couldn’t be bothered going back downstairs again.
Whilst much bigger; the room wasn’t exactly as advertised. We had a larger room with lounge, but the battle-ship grey theme continued. The majority of floor was a slippery, highly polished grey latex compound; the sort you find in hospitals and no doubt prisons, quite luxurious obviously. The shower area was accessed by several steps finished in again the slippery highly polished latex; so, you can only imagine what this was like with wet feet. But no! they had thought of the potentially life threating head injury looming and had provided a single pair of non-slip slippers! Next to the single towel, which was quite useful for 2 people.
The view from the room was another delight not advertised on the website. Had we have known the picturesque landscape would have comprised an abundance of council flats from our balcony; we may have re-thought our choice of accommodation.
Whilst there was TV in the room; unless your first language was German; there was very little point in switching the thing on. Whilst we didn’t go there to watch TV; it is sometimes nice to have on in the background as you are getting ready go out. Fortunately, out of the 300+ channels; they did have 1 English Channel; however, if you are not a fan of African fish markets; global financial investment or aquatic environmental pollution then I would suggest the BBC World News is not for you.
Breakfast in the Lux 11 is special! And perhaps not in a good way. Yet, I couldn’t quite make out why grey and black themed reception area had a cheap plastic golden cat waving; the sort you find in a bad Chinese takeaway on the front desk, a short distance away from an assortment of boiled sweets in glass jars with prongs and plates presented in a highly decorative wall display. Anyway! So, the eating area was a Chinese restaurant that in the mornings was serving German breakfasts with chopticks. Our taste buds were initially violated by quite possibly the most gruesome food that I have had for some time. The bread was so hard; that I fear; had it have rolled off the table and collided with my foot; I would have spent the remained of the holiday in the fracture clinic. The cheese and ham were plentiful; but there is only so much cheese and ham you can eat in a Chinese restaurant for breakfast; however, although there was a cereal option; its grey taint left me feeling queasy. If you wanted an omelette; this was cooked in what appeared to be an inch of oil and practically being deep fried. Cold drinks were generally warm and bizarrely the coffee was luke warm
Having checked out; the girl on reception then tried to charge for our delightful breakfasts; so, we had yet again go through the entire saga of payment and the conversation with the manager on day one.
We asked where could get a taxi and she told us we should walk to the square. The taxi rank was a 10-minute walk up the road through temperatures of -2 with a harrowingly biting cold arctic wind. When I asked could she not call one to the hotel instead; she respond “sure” pressed a button and one arrived literally a minute later! We just looked at each other completely baffled as to why she was quite happy for us to walk out in the icy weather dragging suitcases for 10 minutes when all she had to do was press a button!
Would not return to Belin nor the Lux 11 which is truly a very bizarre and peculiar place.
- Official Description (provided by the hotel):
- Situated in Berlin's pulsating and hip central district of Mitte, amidst creative and chic fashion shops, galleries, trendy media agencies and a myriad of culinary locations, the 72-apartment Lux 11 opened on July 1st 2005. The renowned London-based architect team, Silvestrin/Salmaso, has elegantly fused this stylishly modern structure with its historic setting. With interiors oriented towards hospitality, spaciousness and comfort, the Lux 11's open-plan guest rooms and public spaces provide natural scenery in tones of Chinese green for the gleaming bleached wood furniture and fittings. ... more less
- Reservation Options:
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- Also Known As:
- Lux 11 Hotel Berlin