Ants nest IN THE ROOM. Not ants coming from outside, but a nest actually in the kitchen units. Hope you like sharing food.
Manager was horrible to her staff in front of guests, and horrible to guests for no reason. Knocking on doors and screaming at people kind of horrible.
The door to our room wouldnt lock, and Evil Manager wouldn't move us to another room. So we spent all holiday wondering if anyone might fancy popping in to to nick any of our stuff (the room does come with World's Smallest Safe included, but you have to pay 10 euros per day to get the key!)
Theres no baggage storage for you to use between you checking out and your lift to the airport arriving. Which in our case was 11 hours. Evil Manager will tell you "office too small", because she wants to charge you 45 euros to extend your checkout time instead. If you're not feeling strong and don't fancy pulling your case round Malia all day, many of the local shop owners are restore-faith-in-humanity-level kind, and will look after your case for you just for asking nicely :)
Want air con? That costs 10 euros per day!
Want to use the safe? That costs 10 euros per day!
Want Wifi? That costs extra
Want a blanket? That costs extra
Want TV? That costs extra
Any air con you do pay for is subject to constantly bilge water all over you for the whole time its switched on. The hotel staff know, as all the furniture is warped and waterlogged from them refusing to pay to fix it. If you're lucky, they might give you a couple of buckets to you can listen to them filling up with air-con water all night.
Towels are "washed once per week", but that day of the week is subject to be conveniently forgotten about by hotel staff. Hope you dont mind stinky towels/air drying your bum on the balcony.
You can enjoy an allowance of only 2 rolls of toilet paper for your entire stay. Heaven forbid you use your bowels during your stay.
The hairdryer "included in the room" is a taped over hole in the wall. Don't be fooled, bring your own!
Reps are nice people. All the other guests are cheerful and pick up the mood. Theres good music playing from 10am to 4am every day (which may or may not be your bag). And the standard of cleaning is at least average.
For the same price, you would get a better service at literally any other hotel in Malia. The hidden charges and lack of security are seriously annoying, and in another hotel you dont have to deal with a grumpy manager getting in everyones face all the time.
If you do decide to stay, please please budget for the hidden charges all over the place at Hermes, as they try their hardest to catch you out.
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- Also Known As:
- Hotel Hermes Malia, Crete